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S_Melville's avatar

This absolutely rang true for me. I'm half white half asian and look rather asian (in a really ambiguous, hard-to-pin-down way) and the girl who I mentioned in another comment on another chapter who was half-white and half asian who slapped me in college because I wasn't into fomenting the "race war" she wanted looked completely, absolutely, 100% white. It was f-ing bewildering at the time, but put in this framework it makes quite a lot of sense. I too am completely tired of being told to think about how other people see me and care about that for reasons that have nothing to do with my actual life. And as roughly 99% of my actual interests have nothing whatsoever to do with being "of color" (which to me, sounds EXACTLY the same as how Jefferson Davis would have said "colored", btw) I frequently get suggestions from members of the Elect that my race, as they I suppose define it, should be more relevant to my work. The Elect, and ONLY the Elect, are the only people in the world who have ever had the gall to dictate to me what I should and shouldn't spend my energy on. I guess there's no idea bad enough that someone won't dust it off and try to repackage it for the suckers who don't remember how awful it was the first time. I appreciate this book, and this website, and these comments, so very much if only to feel as if I'm not actually losing my mind.

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LV's avatar

This articles expresses how I have felt my whole life. I am a bit like Thomas Chatterton’s children. I am recognizably Black but not Black in the typical American sense. I was born to upper-middle class immigrant parents who gave us a life of privilege, focused on our academics, and didn’t pass on the same hopeless, depressing American racial narrative that many native Black people drink from. While I was a merely a distant observer to the authentic “Black experience,” I was still constantly put inside the box by well-meaning white and Black people alike who expected all of my interests and attention to center not just on my identity, but THEIR contrived and simplistic version of what they assumed was my identity. For me, this led to identity crises as an adolescent and a larger striving for individuality and my own self. Yes, I am lucky in my life and should not presume to speak

for others, but not for the fact that the Elect would have you believe that others of much more meager upbringings and way less fortunate are somehow privileged over me just because of race, and that all my days are colored by racism and struggle, regardless of my actual carefree and prosperous day-to-day life and circumstances. Luckily, I always placed a premium on reason over emotion (I never stopped seeing our social conventions around race as a construct and most conversations about modern racism to be unproductive), and I was able to convince myself that it was the rest of the world and their fixation on race was not my problem if I didn’t choose it. And I knew that one can support progressive policies that help Black people and poorer non-Black alike without imbibing from the straw of blame, hopelessness, and over-sensitivity.

I don’t think that’s how the majority of people process it, as the contemporary tendency is to embrace an ever more essentialist mindset, like a modern Marxism in which everyone is labor or proletariat, with individual strivings buried into blurry abstracts. Perhaps it is because the human yearning for identity and group-belonging is strong and irrepressible and has calcified around our current categories. Who knows? Maybe we will never get over it. What I hope is that current fashions will one day shift to provide more room

for racial minorities - especially Black people - to see themselves as individuals, and forget their race even for a second, especially when entirely irrelevant. Currently liberals are unfortunately as just as bad on this token as conservatives, and while I am not a political conservative by any means, I feel there is no political home to really seek refuge from this dynamic.

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